You Don't Have to Have Your Whole Life Figured Out Yet

You Don't Have to Have Your Whole Life Figured Out Yet.

There is a particular kind of pressure that comes with growing up.

You are expected to know what you want.

What career you want.

Where you want to live.

Who you want to become.

How much money you should be making.

Sometimes, it feels as though everyone received a manual for adulthood except you.

You look around and someone is starting a business. Someone else is getting married. Another person has travelled to three countries. Someone has just bought a car. Another person has already figured out exactly what they want to do with their life.

And then you look at yourself and wonder:

“Am I falling behind?”

Maybe you're not.

Maybe you're simply living your own timeline.

We have become accustomed to seeing people's achievements without seeing the years that produced them. Social media makes this even more complicated because people usually share the announcement, not the uncertainty that came before it.

We see the graduation photograph.

We don't see the years of studying.

We see the new business.

We don't see the failed attempts.

We see the wedding.

We don't see the years of waiting.

We see the promotion.

We don't see the applications that were rejected.

When we compare our entire journey with somebody else's highlight reel, we will almost always feel inadequate.

The truth is that life does not move at the same speed for everyone.

Some people discover their passion at eighteen.

Others discover it at thirty.

Some people start making money early.

Others spend years learning before finding their direction.

Some people know exactly what career they want.

Others change careers several times before finding something that feels right.

None of these journeys automatically makes one person more successful than another.

There is also nothing wrong with changing your mind.

Perhaps you entered university convinced that you would follow one particular path, only to discover that your interests have changed.

Perhaps the dream you had as a teenager no longer excites you.

Perhaps you are currently doing something simply because you are trying to figure yourself out.

That is okay.

Growing up means discovering yourself repeatedly.

The person you are at twenty may not have the same priorities as the person you become at thirty. And that doesn't mean your younger self was foolish. It means you grew.

We should stop treating uncertainty as a personal failure.

Sometimes, not knowing is part of the process of knowing.

You don't have to have every answer before taking the next step.

You can learn as you go.

You can start small.

You can make mistakes.

You can change direction.

You can begin again.

What matters is that you don't allow the pressure to have everything figured out to stop you from doing anything at all.

If you don't know exactly what you want to do with your life, start by becoming useful.

Learn how to communicate.

Learn a practical skill.

Read.

Volunteer.

Meet people.

Try something new.

Pay attention to the things that make you curious.

Your direction often becomes clearer through movement.

You don't have to sit in one place waiting for a perfect revelation about your future.

Sometimes the path becomes visible after you start walking.

And please don't allow other people's timelines to make you despise your own progress.

Maybe your friend is already earning more than you.

Maybe someone younger than you has achieved something you haven't.

Celebrate them.

Learn from them if you can.

But don't turn their achievement into evidence that your own life is a failure.

There is room for more than one person to succeed.

Your friend's success does not cancel your potential.

Your delayed opportunity does not mean your opportunity will never come.

And taking longer than expected does not mean you have wasted your life.

Sometimes, the seasons that look unproductive from the outside are actually preparing you for something you cannot yet see.

The important thing is to keep growing.

If you cannot change your entire life this year, change one habit.

If you cannot achieve your biggest dream this month, take one step toward it.

If you don't know exactly where you are going, at least make sure you are becoming someone capable of handling where you eventually arrive.

Because life isn't a race where everyone is supposed to cross the finish line at the same age.

It is a journey.

And journeys have different roads, different speeds, unexpected turns and occasional detours.

So breathe.

You are allowed to be a work in progress.

You are allowed to learn.

You are allowed to start again.

You are allowed to say, “I don't know yet.”

Just don't turn “I don't know yet” into “I will never know.”

Keep learning.

Keep moving.

Keep becoming.

One day, you may look back at this uncertain season and realise that you weren't actually falling behind.

You were becoming.