Writers 
Why Do We Miss People Who Didn't Treat Us Well?
Have you ever missed someone and then wondered, “But why am I even missing this person?”
Because when you think about it properly, they didn't treat you that well.
They made you cry. They ignored you. They disappointed you. Sometimes you had to beg for the bare minimum. You remember all the nights you were hurt, all the times you promised yourself you were done, and all the reasons you decided to walk away.
Yet somehow, you still miss them.
It doesn't make sense, does it?
The truth is, sometimes we don't miss the way someone treated us. We miss how they made us feel when things were good.
We miss the person they were in the beginning.
We miss the late-night conversations, the jokes, the calls, the feeling of knowing that somebody was there. We miss having someone to tell about our day. We miss the little things that made us happy.
And sometimes, we are not even missing the person anymore.
We are missing the hope that they would eventually become the person we wanted them to be.
That is one of the hardest things about letting go.
You can know that someone is not good for you and still love them.
You can know that the relationship is hurting you and still wish it could work.
You can be angry with someone and still check your phone hoping they will call.
Human beings are complicated like that.
Another reason we miss people who hurt us is because our minds don't always remember pain the same way we experienced it. After some time, we start remembering the good moments more than the bad ones.
You remember the day they made you laugh until your stomach hurt.
You remember their hugs.
You remember the sweet messages.
You remember how happy you felt when things were good.
And suddenly, you start wondering if leaving was a mistake.
But before you go back, remember the reason you wanted to leave in the first place.
Missing someone is not always a sign that you should return to them.
Sometimes, missing someone is simply part of healing.
You can miss someone and still choose yourself.
You can love someone and still understand that love alone is not enough.
You can forgive someone without giving them another opportunity to hurt you.
And you can remember the beautiful moments without pretending the painful ones never happened.
I think one of the biggest mistakes we make is believing that because we miss someone, we must still belong together.
Not necessarily.
Sometimes you miss someone because they were an important part of your life.
That doesn't mean they are supposed to remain there forever.
People come into our lives for different reasons. Some stay for years. Some stay for months. Some teach us lessons we never wanted to learn.
And sometimes, the person we desperately want to hold on to is the very person we need to release.
So if you are currently missing someone who hurt you, don't be too hard on yourself.
You are not weak.
You are human.
Just remember that missing someone is a feeling, not a command.
You don't have to act on every feeling you have.
Sometimes you can miss them, cry about them, remember them, and still decide not to go back.
And maybe that's what healing really looks like.